Thursday, April 06, 2006

doing crystal meth will lift you up until you break.

Celestial
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Pronunciation: s&-'les-ch&l, -'lesh-, -'les-tE-&l
Function: adjective
Etymology: Middle English, from Middle French, from Latin caelestis celestial, from caelum sky
1 : of, relating to, or suggesting heaven or divinity
2 : of or relating to the sky or visible heavens celestial bodies>
3 a : ETHEREAL, OTHERWORLDLY b : OLYMPIAN, SUPREME
4 capitalized (Celestial Empire, old name for China) : of or relating to China or the Chinese
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Celestial Night. the theme of the Department of Business Studies' Annual Ball for 2006. i should've just listened to carolyn and voted for Summer Romance. but in all fairness, all the themes were under-par. simple, girlie-sounding. overly chinese. even the official theme is. in my capacity as President du jour, you'd think that i'd be able to shoot it down. but i couldn't, because it was basically voted from the shortlist.

i can't really complain over it. i didn't get angry today, and i was even...forgiving. everyone seemed alright and cordial, and everything went on smoothly. now we've got to design promotional materials and soforth. which leads us to question what our own perceptions on the word "celestial" are: for the majority of the design department, it's basically very chinky, with a capital C (shown here for effect).

but i'll just shrug my shoulders, ruffle my hair and manage a smile. with pricing issues smoothened out, and the budget reassessed, everything's almost set. we're meeting the Big Man on Friday afternoon to inform him of our plans and to present the almost-complete divisional proposal. it's so bureaucratic, but it's necessary. i wish he wasn't such a meticulous goat. it'd make our lives easier.

the issue at hand is: will people pay close to a hundred bucks to attend a ball at a hotel they've probably never heard of before? it's a major risk we're taking. previous venues had the benefit of being known. ditto for the shangri-la. but the impiana hotel...sounds so...malay. then again, with the limited seats, it's an exclusive summer's affair.

bollocks.

advantages? we're probably the first academic institution to hold court there.

problems? nobody knows where it is and not a lot of people have heard of it.

and the theme gives me shivers, albeit minor tremors, as opposed to a full-blown case of arthritis.
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just now, a little over midnight, my father called everyone to stare at 2 plates. each plate had a curry puff, and 2 pieces of kuih. it was for ching beng, or all soul's day. i don't wish to disrespect my diseased grandparents, but i couldn't help but laugh to myself (my father would've castrated me if he'd heard audible guffaws) about how funny it was staring at those 2 plates while being encouraged to say something to them "from the heart".

my father's turning into a sensitive man.

then again, he left a special mention for my mom's parents, which he was under no obligation to do.

i can't say that i really miss my grandparents. i didn't know them well enough; distance, years spent away from home...whatever excuses that i can muster up. my grandmother was already paralyzed when i'd returned to kuala lumpur. and that was ages ago.

though i do miss my grandfather's constant swearing. i think the hakkas do it better than the hokkien (even though i'm a closet hokkien). my father told me stories about how my grandmother had pushed me in the tram to watch the trains pass by when i was a toddler. i can't remember any of that.

i've been accused of not putting the family ahead of myself in the past. can i really blame myself for being selfish when everyone else around me is just as bad as i am...if not worse? i remember this letter i'd written to my father once which was basically a big fuck you to the family. he bombed back stating that it was due to the evil machinations of my mother. it could've been, i don't deny it. but at the same time, there're also some seeds of truth to what i'd said, and some justification to what i'd done.

the sad part is, these sad fuckers are the only family i have.

damn.

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