Saturday, January 29, 2005

The Illuminati Return.


I would love to say that it’s been an exhausting week to justify not being here, but it really hasn’t. I’ve submitted my last assignment, and now I’m quite free…if I wasn’t left with the responsibility of promoting HELP Idol. So my dream of sitting at home and playing video games and reading comics is still a short way off, but closer to becoming a reality. It’s the Chinese New Year season, and everyone’s just being very festive…though I don’t see any of those lame-ass music videos released by Chinatunes Sdn. Bhd. or Celebrateyourhunghungchinkness. Honestly, not having Astro isn’t such a bad thing…but in a strange way, I miss seeing those videos full of Gong Xi Fa Cai pomp and grandeur, filmed in China because Malaysia would never look that good in colour.

Okay, now I’m just bringing my country down. But honestly, I guess that since the only real place to embrace your Chinkness is the source, why not go straight to it? It sure beats filming at Thean Hou Temple or Penang, which is what these people have been doing for years…at least they’ve got the budgets to do a proper job. And no, it’s not that I’m advocating these music videos, and it’s not that I’m saying that these music videos represent the true meaning of Chinese culture, but…y’know…they’ve always been around. You can only get used to them.

My Chinkess has been catalyzed by going out with May Ann. I’ve known of the existence of Section 17’s stalls, but never went there prior to going with her there. Ditto for a visit to an area of Kepong that I wouldn’t bother going by myself. It’s not a culture shock because I’ve been to places like these before; it’s more of a new experience. Going out with a cultured Chink girl who loves rock music as much as food stalls is refreshing…it’s not half that bad.

I’ve also binged on soft drinks. I’ve just finished a liter and a half of Sarsi, and paying the price…I feel bloated, and I think the obligatory workout is coming up. Jumping around to music? No…extended footie playing tomorrow. I hope.

This is a less than stellar blog…but I’m too tired to do anything else. I’ve been playing The Punisher for the last 2 days, and I have to say, it’s sickly funny game. Those who despise blood and gore, keep away…but for those who like a fun time with the ol’ ultraviolence are more than welcome to take a shot at it. Good fun, if you like guns.

As for me, I’m preparing to change the world again. Embrace the bengs, love the lians. It’s black and white and red all over.

Thursday, January 27, 2005

okay, i lied. normal blogging will resume on saturday morning. i promise.


Tuesday, January 25, 2005

normal blogging will resume on thursday, 27th janaury, 2005.


Saturday, January 22, 2005

an ode to the wanker-spanker.


geordie was a horny boy,
he was a wanker.
with his free time he played with toys,
he was a spanker.

spanking all the girls he saw,
up in his head.
spanking made the ice cubes thaw,
down in his bed.

wanking and spanking the nights away,
geordie got into trouble with mrs. gray,
for mrs. gray caught him in her loft,
wanking away til his knob grew soft.

she caned him hard without reprieve,
he laughed with glee.
he had never ever had received,
such luxury.

"the sickness has seduced the boy!",
or so she thought.
she stopped spanking him with toys,
he was distraught.

geordie was a twisted boy,
he was perverse.
by eighteen he had fulfilled,
the mighty curse.

he was caught with his pants down,
in midstride.
trying to molest a cow,
he tried to ride.

when asked why he did such deeds,
he only said,
"i tried my best on parakeets,"
"they only bled".

"i used to wank and spank with glee",
"'most everday",
"i opted for beastality",
"...blame mrs. gray".

Friday, January 21, 2005

return to arms.


the last few days have been spent reformatting my hard drive countless times. the fact that xp makes your pc volatile and vulnerable doesn't help...however, i think my pc's relatively stable for now [knock wood]. apologies for the lack of news. nothing much has been happening. i would whine about the lack of response for help idol, but that would be going too far. besides, there's still a month to go, and so much more to do. i'm exhausted, really. and we have a severe shortage of help for the upcoming orientation day. my first real solo organizing duty and it's slipping. brilliant.

can somebody order a pizza, please?

Sunday, January 16, 2005

what could've been and what it became.


recently, i've more than voiced out my desire to get out of a rut, as compared to living one. spontaniety was nonexistent, and the purpose of my very being was being questioned as i contemplated various actions that i could take the further enhance my reputation as being an avid [home] lounge lizard. the weekend had reared its head without much incident, while i mentioned the possibility of embarking on yet another road trip to the nether regions [that sounds gross, doesn't it?] of malaysia. or at least selangor. now, it's not everyday that you get to drive cross-country [or cross-state] if you're not resourceful [in other words, UNbroke enough] to handle logistical issues such as petrol and tolls. but it'd been a while since we'd done anything, and the oppurtunity presented itself in the strangest of ways.

at a&w, malaysian's first [if not premier] convenient fast-food family eating establishment.

after spending a good deal of time at justin's gas station, we went in search of food [if lazing around his room can be called "searching"], and we went to a&w. to cut a long story short, about 2 hours later at 4-ish a.m., justin, sazman and i were in my car [with justin driving the initial route and me handling return journey details], and we were on our way to lumut. to cut an even longer story short, since most of you already know what to expect on the way to lumut...

the ferry fares to pangkor island have increased from RM 2 one-way/RM 4 two-way to RM 5/RM 10 respectively. the jetty has been renovated and reworked to make it more...accessible. must of the rustic old-world charm that i remember has been replaced by something a little more orderly. i'm sure that most of you would find this agreeable seeing how we're supposed to promote our tourist destinations in such a manner that finds it appealing to most, but sexing up [if i can use the term] a jetty is just...well, it's like adding that poly-whatever canopy to petaling street. it's functional, yes...it looks alright [gawdy would be my choice], but it's killing the spirit to whatever was there before. it's not...organic. it's mechanical, it's engineered...cold, even.

after our brief sojourn to lumut, which included grabbing breakfast at a neighbourhood not-quite-seaside nasi kandar eatery, we went to...sitiawan. in search of...lower perak chinese girls.

if i were you, i wouldn't ask for what purpose. i doubt we knew.

we drove around the vicinity...wait, i drove around the vicinity while the two of them slept. as a result, they lost out on beautiful views and bridges. i would've loved to go on, because...well, it looked awesome. but petrol [or the lack of it] was a killer.

one lost chance.

so, after that...fast forward almost 10 hours later and i'm at justin's place, blogging this. my pc at home has died once again [the best things happen at the worst times], and i'm quite blur and dead tired. nothing memorable about this road trip. long, hot, and...not as fulfilling as the previous ones. i guess our minds were on this one, and maybe for a matter of time, our hearts, but sometimes it takes all the commitment that you can give in order for something to actually work.

but, what if...we'd taken the ferry to pangkor?

we'll never know. or maybe we'd know on the next time. who knows? lord, this blows.

highlights: dawn breaking. a sunrise amidst a horizon. a road leading forever, straight to it. around us, endless padi fields with the morning mist flowing off them. ahead of us, more padi fields and an open road. breathtaking if you were there. red sky rising.

lows: ferry fare hikes. scary. lack of girls. and where's Giant that was being advertised? where do all the people hang out? lordy.

quirks: running over a dead animal carcass. and maybe another one. the constant adrenaline rush to find petrol was rather fun. speeding back with the windows open.

lesson of the day: totally unrelated, but don't believe your father when he tells you that he'll be home soon. he's usually lying. even after 10 years.

verdict: might've found a new way there that might be able to save us time. ipoh and penang optional for future road trips. we head north by northwest. soon.

Saturday, January 15, 2005

Hiatus.


I’m feeling rather lonely. I’ve just had breakfast at my friendly neighbourhood roadside Indian eating establishment (the Unnamed Stall), where I consumed my personal dish of a nasi lemak/mee hoon goring mixed platter (that’s what I like to call it), with a nice glass of teh ais. And it’s a good Saturday, too…the sun’s come up, I’ve woken up considerably early (pre-breakfast was spent watching a past episode of Top Gear), and now I’m feeling very, very bored. I have a few options…I can either sit down in front of the television and amuse myself in a few hours of Robotech: Invasion (so far, the game’s quite good), or I could take a leisurely drive around and smoke, or I could finally get down to some serious reading (X-Men), or finish off the first season of The O.C.. But what I really want to do is to go to the mall. And walk around. And laugh at all the Bengs and Lians. But there’s no one to do that with. And, tragically, it feels rather fatal.

I’m lonely.

That sounds like a desperate call for help, doesn’t it? I suppose that it does, but right now I’m in my room, door closed, Razorlight blaring. It sounds like good fun.

How long’s it going to last for? I don’t really know. Clean living is redeeming. Finding “fun” things to do is rather easy…otherwise we wouldn’t really have all the household entertainment appliances that we have today. It makes me wonder…I’ve accumulated a shitload of PS2 games, and I’ve never gotten around to completing a good number of them. And yet, I progress to buying a few more games, and the circle continues. Brilliance. The whole focus on saving money for this year better come into the picture soon…because I’m rather tempted to get stuff that I might need, but would never come around to using. I’ve deleted a good deal of mp3s and music videos. If I think about it accordingly, I should only be downloading albums as opposed to single tracks because they’re arguably more economical (despite taking up much more disk space), and I get a bigger picture of what an “artiste’s” vision is like. Uh…whatever.

Taking a look at what Saturdays have meant in the past, and looking at where they are now, I can say with considerable authority that the younger you are, the more memorable your Saturdays are in respect. And May Ann’s argument that the common Malaysian dating ritual centers around spending a weekend at the mall is accurate…to a degree. But what else is there to do in the city? And it’s not like it’s anything different anywhere else in the world.

People are stuck in a rut. Everywhere. I’ve come to the conclusion that living during the day is nothing compared to living it out at night. At night, we’re all nocturnal. During the day, we’re either sleeping, or just being bored despite being occupied. It’s a sad, sad situation, but I’d rather fast forward time right now and be listening to something nice at La Bodega, sipping on a Caiprinha (oooerrrr) and playing Taboo with someone who’s got my sense of humour (not that I’m saying that my sense of humour is anything to shout about, but I miss spending time with people who’re like me).

Monotony is killing all of us. Slowly, but surely, our lives will be ebbing away to nothingness, simply because we couldn’t find anything to do, and decided not to do anything about it. Justin was proposing a road trip for tomorrow. It doesn’t sound like a bad idea at all. It’s been a while. I guess that life was really good when I was 19. And 16. Last year (and definitely maybe this year) would be known as the period of my life when I was dying for some free time, but didn’t know what to do with it when it finally came.

Brilliance.

I have a sudden craving for Chinese egg tarts.

Anybody up for Scrabble?

Friday, January 14, 2005

Paranoia.


For the last few days I’ve been trodding around with the thought that my father will be coming back anytime soon. My parents have a hearing that’s apparently scheduled on the 17th, and that means that my father has to come back within the next three days; almost a month after his last departure. I’m not really in the mood to see him (am I ever?), but I suppose that there’s nothing that I can do about it, besides run away from home and never come back (funnily enough, I’ve never felt like doing that before…honest). I guess that I’m not willing to go through the same routine of long lectures about how I should be a more responsible person and how I’ve got a whole future ahead of me, and how I’m wasting it by being…me. I’ve already taken enough stick because of that, and…well, it does tend to get boring.

It makes me wish that my dad would sit me down and say how proud he is of the shit that I’ve managed to pull for the last five years. I doubt it, though.

Anyhow, this weekend is probably going to be a boring one. May Ann’s gone off to Hong Kong, and will be back (ironically enough) on Monday. Suffice to say, it’s going to be lonesome somewhat, because besides Justin, I really don’t hang out with anyone. Granted, I can stay at home and read the Uncanny X-Men (which I’ve been neglecting), watch The O.C. (which I’ve been really neglecting) or at least finish something on the PS2 (which I’ve been over-neglecting). I was imagining life today without the Biz Council, and it looked…rosy.

But no way am I going to quit…perish the thought. I’m going to live out the remaining year. Or I could call for an awfully early AGM and then quit early. Fabulous.

Anyway, I walked out of class today knowing that I don’t really have anymore HRM 320 lectures to attend, since we’ve completed the syllabus. I only have to complete the assignment and I can say sayonara to the rest of this semester. I suppose that taking only one subject was a utter waste of time, but I didn’t really have a choice. I don’t think putting ECA activities ahead of studies is a wise move, but at least I’ve been able to complete most of the objectives that I set for myself in terms of ECAs for this semester. Next semester would probably find myself recommitting to the whole idea of academic progress…while this semester was about taking it slow.

I mean, think about it…Christmas, the New Year, Chinese New Year…don’t tell me that I want to be bogged down by studies and not enjoy my life? Yes, I know that other people are more than capable of juggling it…in fact, I know that I’m more than capable myself…it’s just that I choose not to. I’ve realized that I’ve missed out on a lot in the past because I just wasn’t conscious of what I was missing out on…I’m not having any of that anymore.

I want to be there when I can be happy…it sounds corny, but it’s true; wouldn’t you want to live out all the happy times that you can? Because most of life is already entwined with serious concerns and pressing matters…I’d at least like to be there when I know that I can have fun. Everyone should be committed to living.

But when it comes to my father coming back, and the possibility that it could be anytime, I suppose that any happy and easygoing soul would feel a tad bit restrained.

Is it all in the head?

We’ll find out soon.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Horace's and the Last Day of School.


Hello...so sorry. I was about to write some prose about Malaysian drivers, but gave up after realizing that having a lot of things to complain about doesn't readily translate to something that can be properly structured in a lame poem. This is something that I've just come up with...the beginning of the Ode of Horace.
----------
Horace was an ugly boy,
He was fucking fat.
Ev’ryday the kids in school,
Would all say “there’s the twat!”

“A twit?” he asked vehemently,
Ignoring their wild hoots.
He picked the smallest of the lot,
Stomped on him with his boots.

“A twat!” said Shirley Jenkins,
A girl a-half his size.
“You’re so fat the earth can shake!”
With that, he gouged her eyes.

“Who else wants a piece of mind?”
Asked Horace to the crowd.
Up came Jon the jock-to-be,
His pose so tall and proud.

He tried to lift Horace free,
But Horace would not budge.
Jon looked in fear of being jumped,
Fell victim to a nudge.

Horace pumped his fists in air,
With a victory roar.
“I am king of the schoolyard!”
This statement they abhorred.

They prepared a final strike,
They had to bring him down.
How can a social misfit,
Be worthy of the crown?

Then they tried their best in vain,
For Horace was a tank.
He then dug them into the soil,
And underground they sank.

This brief tale shall now be closed,
And now we’ll move away.
Tell the jocks and drama queens,
About Horace’s last day.

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

An Ode To A Road.


The engineers of IGB,
Are a dastardly, dastardly lot,
They plan and plan and plan and plan,
But never reveal the plot.

They closed the road from my home to the mall,
To keep the Seputehians out,
They did it within a working night,
'Fore we asked "what the fuck's this about?"

I’m forced to drive around the bend,
To the bleeding Federal lane,
So tedious my journey is,
That no more time there is to gain.

Should I blame the residents for being dumb?
Should I blame the community?
It used to take 15 minutes to college
I could eat, read comics and pee.

Now the closure has forced my hand,
To be as early as I can be,
All you bloody idiots involved in this,
I distaste punctuality.

You’ve closed the roads,
You’ve made nice bumps,
Only to take them off again.
Oh, my dear, dear IGB,
When the fuck is this gonna end?

Enough's enough, I’d say,
But no one would listen to I,
So forget about complaining...
Coz everyone else would let it by.

But be warned, you touts,
I’ve gone to 1 Utama more than your retail abode,
Despite the fact I love Midvalley,
And it should only be down the road.

So give back the road,
You unruly gents,
You cunts above all cunts.
And you shall hear,
No prose so queer,
From the fattest of all the runts.

Saturday, January 08, 2005

who slew the dog?


ev’ry dog has its day
it eats and sleeps relentlessly
but today was a different day
who slew the dog?

the lessons learnt from today
was that you should never leave the gate ajar
otherwise, a dude will come in with a shotgun and shut your dog up
a big one to the head
sixteen gauge

honestly, your dog was annoying
it was cute as a pup
but i guess we all got annoyed…someone did something about it
tell me…who slew the dog?

he wasn’t really a pedigree…a little more of a mongrel
i don’t care if he had the balls of a grapefruit
someone probably got very annoyed, yes
tell me…who slew the dog?

i’d love to give my condolences
maybe we’d buy fido a bone
we’d stuff it up his grave with the roses
he want to his heavenly doggy pound home

tell me…who slew the dog?
was it terribly necessary?
under the present circumstances…i’d say yes.

i don’t give a damn about who slew the dog.

may we put him on the pedestal for his actions!

the dog is dead!

who slew the dog?


WE SLEW THE DOG.

Thursday, January 06, 2005

quote of the day


from uncanny x-men, volume 1, #141, page 30, final panel

colossus: we are the x-men.

blob: oh yeah? ‘cept for that winged bozo, you sure ain’t no x-men I ever met.

wolverine: that’s right, fasto. we’re better.

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

you heard me.


it's been ages since i've sung in front of people. when you're in that position, you start becoming a lot more self-aware of yourself. you also start noticing little things, like the two MCs being the only people who know who marvin gaye is (fists in the air tell more than they have to). and who tell you, after the show, that you were the hot shit. even though you know they're being nice about it, you still can't help but smile and be modest. unless they seriously meant it, which then, would already see a string of compliments go to our heads. yea, well.

it was a tough crowd. it usually is, but when you're playing music to people who probably don't appreciate maroon 5 as much as the lecturers (who were more than happy to sing along), who walk out during a norah jones cover [done rather well, may i add], and who have absolutely no fucking idea who marvin gaye is (except for our two MCs), you know that it's a tough crowd. granted, this love was pretty alright, with it being the lead-off song and all, but the crowd was dead. some clapped [okay, fine, so it was the committee who decided to sing along], but the least they could've done was to...y'know...live a little.

props must be given to the group of indian girls who seemed to be the only ones who knew the words to the lyrics (besides committee members). mmm. i guess they must've found sunrise to be boring. props must also be given out to those who clapped during the song. shite. paolo and i haven't played this well in ages [that's a white lie, coz paolo does his service for God every other week...then again, he never gets to sing]. so...was it good? we got some to register, and at least things went off without a hitch.

besides the fact that a laptop is missing from the department of business studies that someone could've taken when the excitement was building up.

but yes, it was good. the hard part is keeping up with the momentum that we've found ourselves blessed with. dead crowd? quite. but i suppose that we were anticipating that. it would've been interesting to see what would've happened if we'd gone on for one more song. here's the final setlist for today.

1. maroon 5 - this love (oooerrr...the best)
2. norah jones - sunrise (sinead's nothing compares... was skipped because it would've been too, too boring)
3. marvin gaye - what's going on (which stands as a testament to our days)

free food? tea? all for us. everyone walked out after we were done. does that mean that they were only being polite to us?

i hope not.

ian moment for today: a conga solo gone very wrong during what's going on. past ian moments have included dancing like an idiot on stage, and dedicating sacharrine love songs to attractive girls with boyfriends [and getting roses from them!].

accolade: that we did it just like marvin, and that this love was a perfect acoustic rendition. the liars. also, genuine surprise that i can actually sing. how touching.

main con: i think i'm getting a swollen head over performing at the launching of a scruffy talent contest.

help me.

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

[sic] (or speaking out against the hinges)


there're some things that you do when you're younger because you discover the rebellious spirit that seems to seed itself generously amongst the youth. this spirit will nevertheless pass from you, but a small part of it will always be retained within you...just that the amount of it that stays varies from person to person. but life is a lot less complex when you're younger, even though shades of gray are likely to start tinting your black/white line of reasoning. conditions and compromises start becoming a part of your life, and then, before you know it, you're old. balding. pudgy. a mere shadow of your former self, imprisoned within a body that refuses to de-age itself. none of that can change.

after all, it is life.

i was at paolo's yesterday, practicing songs for the HELP Idol launch [i know i'm organizing it but i still can't help snickering at the thought], and i browsed upon some old photos of [sic]. now, [sic] was jason and paolo. they were [sic]. regardless of the number of drummers that they brought in [they were already at their fifth drummer when i came in...?], they were essentially [sic]. like a keith and mick. a bonnie and clyde. so cheers to them [especially jason sanjeev...i may not have known you well, but you were the quisessential gentleman]. so much effort was put into [sic]; from the pictures, cover and inlay designs, the mock article for the Sun, and, most importantly, the music...it's quite a pity that it didn't take off.

not all boys can be rock 'n roll stars, i guess...but why not?

i'd just like to say that the [sic] performing at the launching is not the [sic] of lore. things've changed. paolo's found God [again]. i'm fatter than i was the last time. there's no jason. it's all ad hoc. the real [sic] is dead. it's just that i didn't really know what to call the act. the "ian tai band" is less than complimentary. "taithinktank"? methinks not.

i'm not here to deface the memory of what [sic] was and what it could have become. far from it. [sic] lives. it just so happens that it isn't [sic] that performs tomorrow.

and no, i never did get the point of [sic] sometimes. but it really was a fun waste of hours [and money] jamming and never achieving anything at all.

i still want to be a indie star. a loveable indie star.

can anyone help me? please?

Sunday, January 02, 2005

Paolo’s New Year’s Day Bash ‘05.


Here’s a cardinal rule that I adhere to: no alcohol. My liver can’t take it, and it’s a very strange thing to get into when you’re out and about, especially clubbing. I can understand that it helps you relax, but too much of it is a bit ridiculous because I like to be fully aware and conscious when I club. And I don’t club all that often, because:-

a) I’m the antithesis to the Ah Beng archetype, and all Ah Bengs are clubbers (this is not a faint generalization...not all clubbers are Ah Beng, by the way), and;


b) I can’t spend that much money on one night without getting some sort of equivalent gratification (read between the lines).

But alcohol plays an important part of anyone’s life. It does help soothe and relax you. To an extent. It numbs pain, and makes you forget your sorrows, only to wake up the next morning with a banging head, or even worse (or better, depending on your point of view) next to a stranger. I remember the first (and only) time that I’ve gotten properly sloshed, in Brazil, with a real Caiprinha. The room around me was spinning, but I was aware of it. Though there wasn’t much that I could do. The Caiprinha served in KL isn’t as hard as the au naturel version. Which I’m quite thankful for.

Paolo’s New Year’s Day Bash '05 was what it’s always been about: good home-cooked food served to a lot of people, the meeting of old acquaintances, and…well, drinking. I’m not a big fan of drinking games, but I joined in this time because it was the New Year, and I normally don’t leave Paolo’s until after 3 in the morning, so I’d have plenty of time to find sobriety. Last year found me just enjoying a simple Gin Tonic and being happy. This year, I was at that stage where I wasn’t sloshed, but irritated by the fact that I was coherent but wobbly. I’m not a heavy drinker. I had a few cups of Vodka + Sprite, as well as JD and coke and then just JD. I don’t mean to sound pretentious…I know a lot of people who’d outdo me, anyway. But I guess that I was kinda satisfied with my performance…if you could call it that.

Not that I’m repeating anything like this during this year. Definitely.

Alcohol only makes you delirious. Some of Paolo’s churchmates were more than overacting to the alcohol. A bunch of class acts trying to be cool. Yes, it’s a scathing thing to say, but when you get a bunch of goody Christians (just like me, almost!) trying to be ultracool by doing what they’d imagine to be the hip thing, it’s almost hilarious. In a bad way. No praise to myself, but at least I try to keep my cool when I’m erratically mindfucked. I try. And I’d like to say that I was at my best behaviour.

Edwin (bless him) puked in the toilet. Loudly. Me, on the other hand, crashed onto Paolo’s sofa for about an hour and a half. I just wanted a quick nap. Anyway, the perfect answer to an aching head is tea. But if you want real sobriety, the only way to do is through gaming. So, after a mind numbing assault of Trivial Assault Unhinged (which, I might say, is the most boring game I have in my gaming library), we proceeded to The Guy Game. And we almost instantaneously sprang back to life. I lost my headache. And we felt a lot more awake.

I wouldn’t be telling you this at dawn on the second day of the new year if I wasn’t. Call it the potent mix of the drinks and the nap, but I feel momentarily revitalized right now. I wonder how long it’d last.

Yes, well. Anyway, the food served was…uh…maca and cheese, curry chicken, a Thai leaf salad mix tortilla (I can’t explain it, but the trick’s in the sauce), spaghetti, rice, and…other stuff which I didn’t really try. I’m quite hungry now. And contented. Here's to the next spectacular event in a long line of Gomes New Year's Day Bashes.

So. Here I am trying to be self-righteous by claiming that alcohol has no place in my life. Or yours. But I’m only lying to myself, aren’t I? But in all honesty folks, drink responsibly. And if you need to get drunk, at least crash at someone’s to sleep it off.

This has been a new year’s public service announcement.

Let’s enjoy this next year to screw up alive.

Saturday, January 01, 2005

2005.


so here we are, a brand new year to screw up once again. checking up on last year's entry, it seems that we've pretty much got everything covered. once again, i'm preparing to bring my playstation to paolo's for paolo's new year's day bash '05...it's like one big cycle. sometimes, the belief is that the new year is only an excuse for God to play tricks with our minds. be it as it may, God gifted me with a well-spent new year's eve (figuratively speaking, if you catch my drift). anyway, now that it's done and over with, i suppose that it's back to work.

resolutions? i've got a lot. but i doubt that any of them would be fulfilled and kept anytime soon. so we can forget about that.

hmph. i suppose that it's only a matter of time before i start getting cynical again.

then again, cynicsm is the juice of reality. gravity isn't that bad, is it?

happy new year, you unbelievers. this year is my year.

i will be back.