Tuesday, July 01, 2003

"oppurtunity"
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image if each day offers a chance to change your world for the better. it might sound cliched, but as all things, there might be a hint of truth behind it. imagine that the person you were meant to live the rest of your life with was on the train that you just missed. imagine that a simple bus ride could throw the stars into your way and you'd be some sort of hero for a day. it's not chaos theory...just imagine that every single ripple seen and felt grows and leads to a bigger, larger, wider wave...it's just that you've got to be the one who slips into the pond. but all this might make us come to the conclusion that the hand of fate might have a role in everything in whatever it is we do; if so, we're not really ready to accept it, are we? my current existenalism crisis right now would be the fact that i'm trying to figure out if things happen because they do, because they can or because they should. and there're differences between the three.

if things happen because they do, then we can apply chaos theory and be happy. for no particular reason, things just happen on cue, like your mail being delivered; you feeling hungry in the morning, and in turn, having breakfast; the fact that your lecturer comes into class late and that the amount of time spent each day on whatever it is you do is just that - time spent.

if things happen because they can, then that highlights the snowball effect, where the ripple grows. not quite fate, but related. a chain of events that go on and on, looking for the right reaction before reacting. the best example would be gambling: it's all left to chance. when the ball finds your roulette counter, all previous attempts couldn't have made it, while the one time that your wager was fulfilled was done so because it could have happened (but doesn't necessarily mean that it was meant to). in short, that one positive outcome is probably the only time that you got it right. ultimately, the second choice is all about chance, risks, and the eventual outcome. a bitch, no?

if things happen because they should, then you can lay it all donw to fate: it happens because it's all pre-ordained, it's a neccesary evil in this life we have. the things we do that we think we have a free choice in, that we believe we have had a hand in getting involved in, has been, in fact, a trivial pursuit that has all been a big, if convincing, lie.

the question is, which camp do you belong to? it can't all be that bad if you believe that your life isn't in your hands, right? but maybe taking each chance that comes isn't that bad.

if you're positive. gains new perspective on being resigned to your fate.

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